Where are The Big Boned Girls in Hallmark Movies?

I am not a huge fan of Hallmark movies. I know that with that sentence I’ve already lost some of you.

There’s no judgement here. I understand that everyone has their own guilty pleasures.  Mine just happen to be sci-fi movies and any sort of fictional show that involves a dance off. I’m waiting for Step It Up 27: Battle of the Nursing Homes.

If yours is “Hallmark” movies, Or “Christmas Love Movies” because now they’re on more than one channel, then dive right in with total abandon. Saddle up with cocoa and every scrap of buffalo plaid fabric you can find and get lost in Kringletownsville, USA. Watch every reporter/blogger/cupcake shop owner, begrudgingly fall in love with every small town Christmas tree farmer/girls basketball coach/puppy resquer. I support you as you enjoy every twinkle light and gazebo.

I accidentally fell into a “Christmas Love Movie” (or CLM as we will call it) without knowing it. It happened to be on Netflix, and the male lead was a comedic writer I liked, so I had hoped for some better dialogue or an interesting plot twist.  

It did attempt to challenge some small tropes. They reframed the problematic Baby, It’s Cold Outside song. But other than that it ticked all the CLM movie boxes. Disgruntled reporter takes a chance on love at Christmastime, -check. They go caroling – check. The guy secretly wants to start his own candle making company – check.  

All these tropes are to be expected. The one I just couldn’t handle was the fat supportive friend. 

In CLMs the heavy set friend serves as the pretty girl’s sounding board. She listens while the successful, ambitious, small bonded girl “takes a chance” on her dreams. She gives the advice and asks the questions the audience is shouting at the screen. She is the voice of reason while she sips wine in a robe on the other end of a facetime call.

There is nothing wrong with being a wise friend. But in these movies this character has no life of her own. She has no plot. She is only there to help the thin girl. A sentient arm chair would be as effective.

Now, I understand that there are characters in films where exposition is their only function. It’s a common thing in movies. But what upset me was that she was the only character that was plus size. Every other female was impossibly thin and gorgeous, right down to the mom and grandma.

Then I saw a preview for another Christmas Love Movie. And there was yet another chubby friend on facetime working as a publicist or assistant supporting yet another impossibly beautiful lead. This time, Brooke Shields was the lead, as hard on the eyes as she is.

I started looking into things with a two minute internet search and I realized that there are almost no heavy set female leads on anything that fits into the “Christmas Love Movie” genre.

This is just strange to me.  There is a whole genre that is marketing to women this fantasy ideal of love and a rose colored situation. Is it so hard to imagine a world where a heavy set woman can fall in love?  We suspend reality for the hot cocoa competition, and the fact that the snow falls on cue, or that there is always a blackout that leads to too many candles and a bottle of wine.  But there is nowhere in this fictional universe for a heavy set person to have a life, a plot point, or a love interest?

And yet I don’t quite understand why this makes me so upset. This isn’t a new problem. There is a need for body representation in all kinds of media. And in general, we’re making great strides.  People who look like me are showing up on the cover of magazines, in print ads, as back up dancers, and grammy winning singers.

I think this is a trigger for me because these movies set themselves up as modern day fairy tales, and I have always loved fairy tales.  But as a kid, it was a little sad that the princesses in these stories never looked like me. These tales didn’t even allow me to pretend that my body size was worthy of love. Now these Christmas Love Movies have created a whole new set of modern “princesses” and it turns out, I’m not wanted there either.

This is just a call to do better. If these movies really are a fantasy escape to a reality wrapped in holiday hope, then why not give all women a chance to see themselves in these winter wonderlands? And if you wanted to add a dance off at the end, I wouldn’t mind.